Isabella Murphy (left) and her grandmother, Kesaia Holmes. (Photo: Isabella Murphy)
In short:
Many Australian Tongans grow up without understanding the language and culture.
Isabella Murphy begins rediscovering her cultural roots after her grandmother’s funeral, where she is exposed to traditional Tongan customs.
What’s next?
A designated language school has been established in Brisbane to help those who want to reconnect with their Tongan heritage.
Isabella Murphy always knew she had Tongan ancestry, but she didn’t know what that meant until her grandmother died.
Growing up near Toowoomba in the Darling Downs region of Queensland, she had a limited understanding of her cultural roots.
It wasn’t until she attended the funeral of her grandmother, Kesaia Holmes, two years ago that she first learned about her people’s traditions and customs.
“When my grandmother passed away in early 2022… I got in touch with her side of the family,” she said.
“I learned about Tongan funeral customs and – this was the first time I’d heard of it – became the funeral rite of passage for my family.”
the fahu plays the role of the mistress of the household.
At the funeral, Ms Murphy was briefed on her duties as a farhu, including dressing the body.
Tonga is a Polynesian kingdom located in the Pacific Ocean, consisting of 170 islands. (Source: SPTO)
“It was a very shocking moment for my family when I realized I was going to be taking on a role that I didn’t understand and a culture that I knew very little about,” she said.
“From that point on, it was like a journey of sorts for myself to discover different aspects of the culture that I didn’t grow up with.”
Having no prior knowledge of her own cultural heritage, Ms. Murphy had conflicting emotions after being exposed to this.
She said there was a gap between how she was raised as a white Australian and how a Tongan was raised, and she wished she had had more of a Tongan upbringing.
An increasing number of Tongan descendants live overseas, usually in Australia, New Zealand or the United States. (Source: UNICEF Pacific)
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Learning about Tongan culture
Ms. Murphy took it upon herself to research Tongan culture.
“I tried to learn a little bit of the language, but it was very difficult and there were very few resources,” she said.
“I learned a lot about Tongan family dynamics, culture and community structure.”
Her current plan is to start by learning the Lord’s Prayer in Tongan.
She had begun to learn a little bit of the language but was having a hard time finding the resources available.
View image of Many Australian-Tongan people grow up feeling alienated from their own culture. (Credit: Naa Taiala)
Brisbane-based Tongan teacher Naa Taiala said Ms Murphy’s experience was not uncommon.
Many of her students share a similar sense of disconnection, having grown up away from local cultural ties as their families migrated to Australia.
She said families were choosing to speak to their children in English rather than Tonga as a way of survival.
Naa Taiala runs Tongan language courses in Brisbane on weekends. (Credit: Naa Taiala)
“Some of them leave Tonga with barely any English or have problems finding jobs because of their poor English,” Ms Tayala said.
“Most of the people and kids that our kids actually work with speak English, so we need to teach our kids to speak English to fit in.
“It’s not a choice, it’s a priority.”
Besides teaching the language itself, Ms Taila also organises traditional festivals at school and wears Tongan costumes.
Her courses provide Australian Tongans with an opportunity to rediscover themselves and immerse themselves in the local culture.
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